EHSAAN QURAISI: Hindi Jokes

Ek din, main Delhi pahuncha,
Station pe ek coolie se bahar jane ka rasta pooncha.
Coolie ne kaha: "Bahar jaake poocho."

Maine khud hi rasta dhundh liya,
Bahar jaake taxiwale se pooncha:
"Bhai saab Lal Kile ka kitna loge?"
Jawab mila: "Bechna nahi hai."

Taxi chod, maine bus pakad li,
Conductor se pooncha: "Ji, kya mein cigarette pi sakta hoon?"
Wo gurrra kar bola: "Hargiz nahi, yaha cigarette pina mana hai."
Maine kaha: "Par wo janab to pi rahe hai!"
Phir se gurrrraya: "Usne mujhse pooncha nahi hai."

Lal Kile pahucha, hotel gaya.
Manager se kaha: "Mujhe room chahiye, satvi manzil pe."
Manager ne kaha: "Rahane ke liye ya koodne ke liye?"
Room pahucha, waiter se kaha:
"Ek paani ka gilas milega?"
Usne jawab diya: "Nahi sahab, yahan to saare kanch ke milte hain."

Hotel se nikla, dost ke ghar jaane ke liye,Raste me ek sahab se pooncha:
"Janab, ye sadak kaha ko jaati hai?"
Janab hans kar bole: "Peechle bees saal se dekh rahan hoon,Yahi padi hai... kahin nahin jaati."

Dost ke ghar pahucha, to mujhe dekhte hi chownk pada, Usne poocha: "Kaise aana hua?"
Ab tak to mujhe bhi aadat pad gayi thi, Maine bhi jawab diya: "Train se."

Meri aaobhagat karne ke liye dost ne apni biwi se kaha: "Areeee sunti ho... mera dost pehli baar ghar aaya hai, Uuse kuch taja taja khilao."
Sunte hi bhabhiji ne ghar ki sari khidkiya aur darwaje khol diye.
Kaha: "Taji hawa kha lijiye."

Dost ne phir se baday pyar se biwi se kaha: "Areeee sunti ho, inhe jara apna chalis saal purana aachar to dikhana."
Bhabiji ek baatli me rakha aachar le aayi. Maine bhi apnapan dikhate hue bhabiji se kaha: "Bhabhiji, aachar sirf dikhayengi, chakhayengi nahi?"
Bhabiji ne taak jawab diya: "Yuhi agar sab ko chakhati To aachar chalis saal purana kaise hota?"

Thodi der baad dekha, bhabiji apne potey ko sula rah
thi, Saath me lori bhi ga rahi thi: "Diploma so ja, diploma so ja."
Lori soon mein hairan hua aur dost se poocha: "Yaar, ye diploma kya hai?"
Dost ne jawab diya: "Mere grandson ka naam, Beti bambai gayi thi, diploma lene ke liye Aur saath mein ise le aayi, Isiliye hamne iska naam Diploma rakh diya."
Phir maine pooncha: "Aajkal tumhari beti kya kar rahi hai?"
Dost ne jawab diya: "Bambai gayi hai, degree lene ke liye."